...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
Randomize
