so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
NoShamevember. You game?
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
Randomize
