worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
Randomize
