I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
Randomize
