I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
I didn't shave. On purpose
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
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