YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
I just talked to a CEO of a fortune 500 company while pooping. I LOVE being self employed.
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
I take back everything I said about communal showers
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
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