my mouth tastes like poor choices
Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize
