So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
I told the emergency room nurse I didn't want to stop and ruin the moment. She said safewords are there for a reason. Super condescending. Got her number though.
Turns out it's a fake number.
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
