Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
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