I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
Randomize
