dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
The beers last night were like the tears from god
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Randomize
