i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
Randomize
