Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
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