it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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