After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
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