question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
Randomize
