This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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