? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Randomize
