I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
I didn't notice because vodka
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
Randomize