she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
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