Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
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