new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
"Don't get as drunk as I was on my birthday" has been upgraded from a goal for Friday night to a goal for my life in general.
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
Can't talk, ducks in the car
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
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