So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
Randomize
