Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
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