She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
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