i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
