the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
