I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
Randomize
