I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Randomize
