yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
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