I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Randomize
