people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
well most of my day revolves around power hour
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
First things first, I always get more drunk than the birthday girl. Like, who's idea was it to sing karaoke? I killed it.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
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