ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
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