one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
Are we still banned from the library?
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
highlight of my day: hitchhiking a ride with random locals. tried to make conversation, asked what they do. driver says "you clearly don't recognize me." turns out i have had sex with him and forgot.
You are officially qualified to graduate from college.
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Randomize
