she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
