would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
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