That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
Randomize
