I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
I can't put those talents on a resume
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
Randomize
