It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
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