Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
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