three words: i give head
three words: not that well
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
and you fell through a lawn chair
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
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