uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
do herpes really smell.
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
Randomize