Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
Randomize
