everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
Randomize
