He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
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