There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
I'm at a crab and wine festival with my dad. He just introduced me as his girlfriend to all of his co-workers. I am so drunk I thought he was serious.
So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
Don't ever give your dog some hamburger at midnight. Its impossible to enjoy a late night burger when your dog just threw it up all over your carpet. Gremlin rules work with dogs.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
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