: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
kristin has been a bad kristin
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
I woke up to an email from Groupon for 3 laser lipo treatments...on Valentine's Day...way to kick me when I'm down Groupon.
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
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