I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
Randomize
