have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
Randomize
