I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
Randomize
