i'm lost and i look like a hooker
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
this must be what syphilis tastes like
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
when I finally convinced you to get off the floor you looked at me wild-eyed and said "the carpet was a VAST EXPANSE OF SEA"
Randomize
