I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
Randomize
